TEN STRATEGIES FOR FIRST-TIME MOTHERS

1. There is more than one way to do everything
   1. Make decisions based on what is right for you and your family at this time.
   2. Other people can only tell you what's right for them. If an idea makes sense, figure out how it could work for you.
   3. No source of information is the absolute truth for everyone.
   4. Situations change, so what's right today may not work tomorrow.


2. Know you are going to make mistakes, accept it and move on
   1. Know that you are doing the best you can at the time
   2. Learn from your mistakes. Determine how you will do things differently next time.
   3. Regrets and worry take up mental energy that could be better spent on something that is fun, will bring joy or lighten your load.


3. Lighten Up
   1. What can you eliminate, either temporarily or permanently, to make life with an infant more manageable?
   2. Identify what can be postponed or done less frequently.
   3. Prioritize and work on highest priority tasks first.


4. Don't go it alone
   1. What can you get someone else to do for you?
   2. Identify what your spouse can do to help out. Turn over these tasks/chores to them.


5. Do something for yourself every day
   1. It can be something small like a cup of tea, a phone call to a friend or something more substantial like a manicure, facial or lunch with a friend.
   2. Create a list of things that bring you joy. Try to do one thing every day.
   3. Start a list of wonderful things about yourself. Add a new item every day.


6. Look for opportunities to incorporate physical activity into your day
   1. Walks, that's what carriages were made for!
   2. Even 5 to 10 minutes a few times a day makes a difference. Be creative!
   3. Activity is a proven stress-reducer and energy enhancer. It will make you feel better.


7. Make friends with other new moms.
   1. Connecting with friends helps you remember you are not alone.
   2. New moms share their feelings and experiences which are often remarkably similar to yours
   3. Friends are a great source of information about community resources and activities


8. When in doubt, call your pediatrician
   1. Your pediatrician and their nursing staff have lots of experience with infants. It's smart to ask an expert.
   2. Do not limit your questions to health alone. Your pediatrician is an expert in infant and child development as well.


9. Get out of the house regularly
   1. Visit your local library. It is a good source of information, as well as having many board books, music tapes and CDs, and videos for infants
   2. Go to a park, feed the ducks, take a class with your child (such as Music Together)


10. Maintain your relationship with your spouse
    1. You are in this together and cooperation make life more pleasant.
    2. Your spouse, even if they are not verbalizing it, has concerns and fears that may influence their actions.
    3. Find some time, however short, to connect with your spouse regularly.

Sharon Kratochvil, Ph.D.
Organization & Personal Development Coaching
(203) 359-9408
Sharon@CoachSharon.com

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